Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times and The Stranger nightlife listings for abundant source material!

Readers new to the blog should know I am also a novelist. My fiction writing and band-name obsession collided in my first published book, the garage-rock fairy tale The Gospel According to St. Rage. Yesterday, The Protagonist Speaks featured an interview with main character Barbara AKA St. Rage. Get to know Barbara in her own words here. St. Rage may be a fictional band, but their music and merch are real! Suitable for gift-giving–items ordered by December 13 should arrive in time for Christmas.

Meanwhile, I am here every week to provide the gift of memorable band names. As ever, and especially if you’re going out to shows again, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for even better days.

Ex-Florist
A divorce so messy it splashes onto all the wedding vendors.

Fuzz
I have a soft (possibly fuzzy) spot for monosyllabic band names. This one evokes both cuddly softness and noisy distortion.

Okey Dokey
I like the unrelenting positivity of this old-timey expression. It’s so square that using it as a band name takes it all the way back around to cool.

Riot Earp
If things got even more out of hand at the OK Corral.

Spacewalk
Who do you listen to when you’re working outside your ship?

Two last things before you go:

1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. The next one comes out in January 2022! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)