Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 7, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Once again the listings came through with five terrific band names I had not featured before. After almost nine years, I’m thinking this will always be so. If they do come up short, I hope it is next week because I’ll be taking a break from blogging to help staff the Not A Pipe Publishing booth at Rose City Comic Con. If you’re there, too, be sure to stop by booth 1007, check out the wide array of science fiction and fantasy titles, meet some of the authors (including me), and play a fun game for discounts!

Without further ado:

The Good Weird

My people! Strange but not creepy or threatening, engaged in quirky activities most folks wouldn’t even consider but might like if they tried.

Kitten Forever

I have old cats, so I find this touching. Although kittens grow into cats in no time, they don’t outgrow their kitteniness. Even ancient cats don’t show their age until they’re ready to lay down that ninth life.

No One Lives

Spoiler alert for many horror films, Shakespeare plays, operas, and life.

Odds

I respect a small word with many meanings: chances (never tell me the …), scraps (… and ends), not divisible by two (1, 3, 5 …), some weird stuff (one hopes good weird).

Snailbones

I’m intrigued by this idea that an exoskeleton–a shell–is by definition the squishy thing’s bones. Also highly appropriate that they’re playing The Kraken. Mollusks gotta stick together.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 31, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I was surprised and tickled this week to learn that my blog and I were mentioned (not by name but it was obvious to those in the know) in a promo video for past honorees Blood, Fire and Rainwater. I’m here to celebrate a small but important aspect of the music scene and encourage shares if it will help promote a band. This week, that means these five:

Bürien

Local flavor tastes even better with an umlaut.

The Journey of Not Knowing

This is what we call “maturity.” In childhood, nothing made sense and nobody explained anything. At eighteen, I knew it all. At nineteen, I went back to not knowing much and have remained there for 3 decades plus. It’s been an educational trip. (In trying to find out about the band, I learned that this is the title of a book on leadership. Sounds right.)

Seratones

Feel-good music at a neurological level.

Western Settings

When I was young, most kids’ books seemed to be set on the East Coast or in Europe (or fantasy Europe). I longed for western — specifically Pacific Northwestern — settings that I could recognize. Now I write them for myself.

Winks & Nods

I like how this can be read as stage directions, categories of gestures, or a duo act with these nicknames. But you won’t get a straight answer no matter how you read it.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 24, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

The big excitement this past week was the re-release of my Seattle-set garage-rock fairy tale, The Gospel According to St. Rage on Tuesday, followed by the radio debut of the titular garage band on Wednesday. DJ Barnabas of the show Community Noise on KBFG 107.3 FM embedded “Huge Guy in the Mosh Pit” into a fun and eclectic playlist. It was an honor to be programmed next to Dead Bars. If you want to donate your own music to the Community Noise collection for possible radio play, email CommunityNoise.blog@gmail.com.

And now, on with the band names!

Far Flung Future

Where your whiz-bang sci-fi tech might not be obsolete before the book is published.

Meat Hair

Perhaps the grossest hair treatment since egg shampoo.

Sir Ma’am Sir

How you address your commanding officer when they haven’t told you their preferred pronouns and you don’t want to be the first to ask.

Smaller in Person

“Judge me by my size, do you?”

Your Downstairs Neighbors

They (and your cat) would appreciate it if you didn’t vacuum every day. They might even agree to turn down the music.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 17, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Before we get down to the serious business of celebrating band names, I’m tickled to share a brand-new St. Rage track, “The Leaves Were Wearing Her Lipstick.”

Barbara (AKA St. Rage), the protagonist of my garage-rock fairy tale The Gospel According to St. Rage, is a songwriter because that seemed like a plausible starting point for a friendless musician who has never been in a band but ends up starting one. I had no intention of writing songs, but Barbara’s song titles were so great. I started writing lyrics, and enlisted my brother to help put them to music. In that book, Barbara made an observation about oak leaves that went into a poem for a school assignment instead of a song because the poetry assignment had a deadline. In Book 2, Barbara and the Rage Brigade (coming in November 2019!), she finally wrote the song.

But enough about me and my fictional band. This week’s listings gave up these treasures:

deathCAVE

I find it interesting that of these two foreboding elements, more emphasis is placed on “cave.” It’s dark in there, with strange echoes.

Dream Queen

The grooviest monarch, who can turn terrifying without warning.

Impulse Noise

If the notion strikes you, just start banging on stuff.

Pain Field

Local flavor! Remove a silent E to reveal acres of suffering.

Pedestria

Here’s where I want to live! Nobody drives because everything is within walking distance.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 10, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Gospel+re-release+eBook+cover+edit+2I woke up to the cover reveal and pre-order announcement for my next book. Since this is a re-release, it was also my first book, which only makes this extra special. The Gospel According to St Rage is a Seattle-set garage-rock fairy tale about an invisible girl who puts on a hat, starts an all-girl band, and develops anger-fueled, gesture-based superpowers. It was in this story that my blogging and fiction writing first converged, so I’m excited to release it into the world once again.

These non-fictional band names are pretty special, too:

Bad Books

That novel you’re embarrassed to be seen reading, but you can’t stop turning the pages. This is where ebooks come in handy.

Crisis Actors Guild

Google search for this very official-sounding name seems to have about equal chances of turning up a conspiracy-theory debunking website or this punk band. Sounds about right.

Mamalarky

Straighten up. Mom doesn’t have time for your baloney or monkeyshines.

Specswizard

Magic glasses instead of a wand. (I am bespectacled and I write about wizards, so this one jumped out at me.)

We Could Be Monsters

Every little cute thing has this inspirational poster.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 3, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

67340208_10215080709550518_3444971926429106176_nWhat a week it has been! I got my author face out in public for a reading to launch Wizard Girl; celebrated my 56th birthday by walking home from work on a beautiful day (about 5 miles); recorded a couple demos of new St. Rage songs; enjoyed a recital of modern vocal music; and now I’m on vacation! On top of all that, I get to lift up these five fine band names:

Bragrat

When a typo becomes a character. This rodent has no lack of confidence and will tell you all about it.

Clandestine Beam

Poetic oxymoron. No one lights a lamp, then hides it under a basket.

Jack and the Dull Boy

I like this one both for the classic X and the Y structure and for the creepy literary reference. (It appears to be an actual two-piece, too. Not sure which one is Jack, but their demo is not dull.)

Rather Ordinary Dudes

A humble, aw-shucks attitude to balance Bragrat, who are on the same bill.

Schmutzhund

Fierce guard dog has a dirty face. Granny licks her handkerchief.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 27, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Wizard Girl cover imageI will lead off with Shameless Self Promotion: My new fantasy novel, Wizard Girl (sequel to 2018’s Daughter of Magic) released this week! I’m tickled beyond belief to be reading and signing TONIGHT at 7 pm at Third Place Books–Ravenna. Details here. I hope to see both familiar and unfamiliar faces in the audience. Come ask me some wacky question I’ve never thought about before (as long as it’s appropriate for an all-ages crowd).

But we’re all really here for band names. Once again, the listings do not disappoint:

Bensbeendead.

Ben, to universe: Is that all you got?

(Also digging the period at the end of the sentence.)

Divorce Care

You could join a support group. Or you could go to a punk rock show and mosh to keep from crying. Careful, though; you might end up with a tear-shaped bruise.

Have Patience

If your online date doesn’t get your sense of humor, move on. Take your time. Your own personal weirdo is out there.

It Looks Sad.

Or forget online dating. Give in to those big puppy eyes and rescue a dog. (Also, another complete sentence with a period at the end! Is this a new trend in band names?)

Johnny and the Moles

The sound from the underground. You can’t go wrong with classic X and the Y structure.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)