Square Pig in a Round Hole-November 27, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times and The Stranger nightlife listings for abundant source material!

I hope you had a peaceable and satisfying Thanksgiving, however you celebrated. We had a small but beloved group at the table (and a lovely roast duck, if I do say so myself). The celebration continues this afternoon, when some of us from Square Pig HQ will venture out to donate blood, a perfect opportunity to share one my favorite St. Rage songs:

Meanwhile, I’m thankful to eke out another post with five more band names! As ever, and especially if you’re going out to shows again, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for even better days.

If I’m at someone’s house, I will befriend the pets. I’m fine with cats and dogs, but I never know what to say to the parakeets.
 
Cleverly slipping cannabis into the turkey stuffing to stop the political arguments before they start. Now everyone’s in a happy food coma amid the wreckage of pies.
 
The wide-eyed look of pleasant surprise? Or the exclamation when you can’t unsee something dreadful?
 
A dedicated band of postal mollusks, delivering our letters … eventually.
 
Wearing a tailored suit and robbing with a fountain pen.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-November 20, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times and The Stranger nightlife listings for abundant source material!

It seems like Thanksgiving is taking a lot of people by surprise this year. Easter, I can understand, but Thanksgiving more or less stays put. That said, I admit to thinking, “Already? Didn’t we just do this?” But I am thankful for band names and live music. In searching the listings this week, I was reminded that one of my favorite local bands, Dead Bars, has a sold-out show on Thanksgiving Eve with past Square Pig honorees Bottlenose Koffins and Dusty Cubby. If you’re lucky enough to go, I want to hear about it!

As ever, and especially if you’re going out to shows again, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for even better days.

Bathtub Kin
If you were ever bathed alongside a sibling or cousin, this homemade hooch is for you.
When religion openly claims its title as the opiate of the masses.
 
When you can’t afford an entire houseboat.
 
The pun turns something strong into something falling apart.
 
It turns out magic is real, but only if you have all the pieces of the puzzle. There’s only one or two missing here.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-November 13, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times and The Stranger nightlife listings for abundant source material!

Wow, week 2 of all new material! While I am not personally quite ready to go out in crowds, I am excited to see live music emerging from a long hibernation, and hope this winter doesn’t force another pause. As ever, and especially if you’re going out to shows again, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for even better days.

Backwhen
The perennial destination of the Wayback Machine.

The Earthlings
Once upon a time, I got curious about the root of the word “earth.” Turns out, it comes from an old, old word meaning “soil.” The word “human” comes from the same root as “humus”–again, soil. We humans are dirt people. We are earthlings.

God Awful
If God is good, how awful can this be? (There are at least 3 bands using this name. This iteration appears to be a one-off for a specific event, but it got my attention.)

Medium Build
The main character of my garage-rock fairy tale The Gospel According to St. Rage describes herself as “a medium size white girl with medium-length medium-brown hair.” She starts the book invisible. But when the average and ordinary start to make some noise, watch out!

You Said Strange
I want to hear the conversation before and after this … objection? Delighted exclamation? How far beyond strange did the situation go, and was it good strange or the other kind?

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-November 6, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times and The Stranger nightlife listings for abundant source material!

 

Square Pig in a Round Hole was launched upon the world on this very date in 2010! Read the first post here. This anniversary seems like an auspicious date to return to posting new material, after 84 consecutive weeks of retrospectives. The Seattle Times is not yet running nightlife listings, so I went foraging in The Stranger and found enough to work with. I also noticed one of the featured bands of that historic debut post, All Time Low, has a gig this week!

As ever, and especially if you’re going out to shows again, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for even better days.

Image of the ferry Kalakala

Battlestar Kalakala
The pickings seemed slim, but then I saw this one and knew I had to forge ahead! This is a brilliant mashup of a sci-fi show I loved in my youth and a futuristic local icon of the past. It would make a beautiful spaceship.

Cedar Teeth
Locally sourced, durable and rot-resistant, repels moths from your mouth.

The High Seagrass
I like how it crosses from adventurous location to important marine habitat, with maybe a sly reference to an old nickname for something (now legal) to get us high.

Ice Cream Cult
I can think of worse things to worship. Ice cream makes everything better. (Also sometimes stylized as Icecreamcult.)

Left to Suffer
… right to stagnate, straight ahead to thrive.

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 30, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #84

It’s Halloweeneen and I have one last batch of monster-themed band names to fill your treat sack. However you plan to celebrate, be safe out there. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Sewer Troll 
(February 20, 2013) Urban trolls have it figured out. They never have to risk coming out in daylight. They can lurk in the sewers and only appear on the Internet.

Siegfried vs. the Giant
(December 11, 2010) Hooray for Norse mythology geeks! Siegfried is my favorite big dumb hero.

We Could Be Monsters
(August 10, 2019) Every little cute thing has this inspirational poster.

Wet Nightmare 
(May 7, 2011) This name conveys in two words all the wonder and horror of puberty.

Wounded Giant
(January 4, 2014) There’s a whole epic contained in these two words.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. The October 2021 issue is out now! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 23, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #83

Are you ready for the bomb cyclone? So far, it is amounting to no more than breeze and drizzle at Square Pig HQ, but there is lots of time for it to build up to something bigger. We cleared our downspouts and secured everything that might blow around, just in case. Meanwhile, even if there’s no monster storm, I have another set of monster-themed band names for your reading (and listening) pleasure. For the second time in as many weeks, I include a new one! Thanks to the Facebook friend (different from last week) who made the suggestion. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Mega Bog
(February 3, 2018) Super-powered swamp creature rises from the undrained morass to save us from the real monsters.

Monster Magnet
(November 23, 2013) That is one rough dating scene.

Of Monsters and Men
(New!) This would have fit just as well with the literary theme I did some months back. I like how it extends the group whose plans fall through or go astray to mythical creatures, especially those we fear. We’re not so different, after all.

Saliva Giant
(January 24, 2015) Disgusting on a hilariously grand scale. Have to respect that. Do not get in a spitting contest with this one.

Screature
(October 8, 2017) Horror-movie two-fer: monster and sound track both.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. The October 2021 issue is out now! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 16, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #82

The rain has returned, the leaves are turning bright colors, and I’m on vacation! That must mean it’s mid-October, when I’ve taken time off every year since my honeymoon in 1986. A few months ago, we thought we’d actually go somewhere for this one, but we have postponed once more out of abundance of caution and tentative hope for spring.

BUT I still have lots of monster-themed band names for your treat sack! This week’s batch even includes a new one, the first fresh material in 19 months. Thanks to the Facebook friend whose timely post about going to a show caught my attention as I was planning this theme. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Godzillian
(May 26, 2013) Just how many is a Godzillian, and can it be applied to anything or just giant rubbery monsters? (Sadly, it appears they are no longer active and have disappeared from the internet.)

Here Come the Mummies
(NEW!) I’m not detecting a lot of terror or even surprise here. We’ve been expecting them, there was a delay, but they’ll arrive soon. Then the Halloween party can begin.

hedgehag
(October 3, 2015) I’ve seen references to both “hedge witch” and “hag” in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld books, but I never put  together the resemblance, when combined, to the name of the cute spiny critter. Good for October, though more homey charm than scares, and a fine name for an all-girl bluegrass outfit.

Kung Fu Vampire
(May 26, 2013) B-movie vibe doesn’t get much better than this.

The Magic Beans
(May 6, 2017) . . . and the next thing you know, you’ve got giants falling from the sky. Might be worth it, though.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first eleven issues and subscribe here for future issues. The October 2021 issue is out now! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 9, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #81

It’s going to be a busy weekend, so I’m scheduling this post in advance. I’m participating in the FREE Words & Pictures Festival, an all-virtual event featuring author readings, writing workshops, panel discussions, and more, including programming especially for teen writers on Sunday. I will be reading from Death’s Midwife on Saturday morning at 10 am and participating in a panel of YA authors offering advice to teen writers on Sunday at 2:15 pm. Schedule and registration link are here.
But right here, the Monster Mash (or is that Mosh?) continues, with five more monster-themed band names for your spooky-season enjoyment.

As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Boomzzilla
(April 27, 2013) Drum monster! Promise of good, dumb fun.

The Drolls
(August 19, 2017) Like trolls, but with a more sophisticated wit.

Explodatron
(March 31, 2012) Over the past 21 years [Update: 30], I’ve learned a lot about what appeals to boys. A giant robot that blows things up would be high on the list.

Fake Shark Real Zombie
(January 28, 2012) I saw Jaws when I was 11, only to discover too late that I was one of those younger children for whom the movie was too intense. When I finally saw it again as an adult, I laughed because the shark was so obviously fake. In the campy monster movie with the same name as this band, I would then turn around to confront a real zombie and either die of fright or somehow remove its head.

Closeup image of garden spider on web

Great Spiders
(September 29, 2012) Giant spider in the third act!

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 2, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #80

It’s a new month and a new theme! As we head into spooky season, I dug up an abundance of monster-themed band names. There’s enough for several treat sacks, so let’s get started. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Alien Ant Farm
It Lives, It Breathes
(November 1, 2014) It seems appropriate so close to Halloween to have two band names with that great B-movie vibe. I can imagine at least two scenarios for an alien ant farm — aliens keeping humans or humans keeping aliens. Both pretty horrifying for someone! And any monster movie with the line, “It lives! It breathes!” is about to get real messy.

All Them Witches
(May 6, 2017) A rustic locution serving to downplay their spooky power. So many witches.

Angry Snowmans
(December 11, 2010) Nice seasonal touch, with a twist. I’m thinking of the Killer Monster Snow Goons on Calvin’s front step. The incorrect plural adds a touch of childlike sweetness . . . or is it spine-tingling peril?

Bell Witch
(June 12, 2012) I hope this is a play on bellwether, because that’s really clever in several directions. If not, oh, well.

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. The July 2021 issue includes an excerpt from Barbara and the Rage Brigade. Who knows what might turn up in the October issue! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 25, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music listings return, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #79

Image shows Mt. Rainier against a clear blue sky with rocky trail in foreground.
Mt. Rainier from Pinnacle Saddle

The outdoorsy theme continues with a second collection of six band names–yes, a bonus name! I’m feeling generous because we did get to take our planned hike last Monday, in spite of a stormy weekend and some minor car trouble. (Minor in that it did not keep us from getting to our trailhead and did not keep us from getting home. It did cost money to fix, but not as much as we feared.) We should have a few more of these sunny fall days, so get out and enjoy them while you can!

As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Coho Mountain String Ticklers
(January 13, 2013) “Tickle” is the perfect verb for how bluegrass players get sound out of their instruments, and also how this name affected me.

Dead Leaf Echo
(September 26, 2015) Perfect for autumn. If a leaf falls in the forest, does it make a sound, and does the sound have reverb? (A quick listen answers “yes.”)

Neither Bears nor Forest
(June 22, 2019) Weirdly poetic turn of phrase for something that isn’t what it purports to be.

Night Hikes
(January 12, 2019) Probably not a popular winter activity, though it gets dark so early, you could have your walk in the woods and get back to town before the first band finishes sound check.

Nonchalant Avalanche
(April 16, 2016) Slides down the mountain without a care in the world, elegant in n and ch sounds.

Pebble n the Crick
(July 29, 2017) Charming variation on classic X and the Y structure, made more so by the folksy phonetic spelling of creek. If that weren’t enough, the name implies frontperson and backing band but it’s a duo, my favorite size combo.

Two last things before you go:

  1. I am admin for The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. The July 2021 issue includes an excerpt from Barbara and the Rage Brigade. Who knows what might turn up in the October issue! (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)