Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 18, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

We now return to our regularly scheduled Seattle January: 40 degrees and raining. I’m glad the snow mostly fizzled, though I didn’t say no to my one snow day. It’s good to know that events this week are unlikely to be cancelled, including shows by these well-named bands:

Evulse

I first encountered the word evulsion as a pre-teen, when my sister took first-aid training. I remember a morbid delight that there was a special word for a body part that had been forcibly removed. It never occurred to me until now that of course there would also be a verb for the violent act.

Hans Gruber and the Die Hards

Gotta respect a band that uses classic X and the Y structure to refer to a pop culture icon in a different medium. Yippee ki yay and Merry Christmas.

Little Hero

An always-welcome reminder that size matters not in the do-gooder business.

Shady Bug

Underhanded insect, crawly staying out of the sun, or perhaps a beetle large enough to serve as a parasol.

Teen Bop Hit Factory

If you take the tour, be sure to bring your dancing shoes in case they pass out samples.

Shameless Self-Promotion: Next Saturday, January 25, at 7:00 p.m., I will read from and sign my latest novel, the punk rock/superhero mashup Barbara and the Rage Brigade, at Third Place Books Ravenna. Details here. Until then, enjoy these 4 songs I wrote for the book:

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 11, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Winter was shaping up to be an extended fall/early spring, and then somebody had to go and put snow in the forecast. Bah. My elbow is still recovering from last February. If it happens, I hope nobody has to cancel their show, especially any of these winners:

Bandaid Brigade

Childlike risk-takers, patching up boo-boos and marching onward. (With my latest novel Barbara and the Rage Brigade out in the world, it’s safe to say that for the foreseeable future, I will honor anyone with “brigade” in their name.)

Echo Relocation

When bats’ employers transfer them to a different cave, somebody has to help with the move.

Hellport

Change one letter and suddenly instead of a convenient point of egress from the urban core, you’ve got an opening to a nasty other dimension. Maybe the boss really is that evil.

The Out of Body Experience

The simple addition of the definite article transforms a mystical event into a groovy (and maybe still mystical) event.

Several Other Ghosts

Too late to visit Scrooge on Christmas Eve, they find themselves at loose ends, available for hauntings, weddings, bar mitzvahs, and children’s parties.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 4, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Happy New Year & New Decade! Don’t give me any argument about the decade beginning next year–it’s the ’20s now, so let’s just shut up and learn to Charleston. It goes without saying that the celebration of band names will continue as long as the listings include treasures like these:

David’s Van

Shoutout to every garage band’s beloved if unreliable vehicle that makes touring or even just gigs possible.

Microtonic

All it needs is a little gin. Very little.

Motionless in White

Arty and opposite; how often is rock music still or clean? (The paper inadvertently ran the names of co-headliners together. The name I thought I was choosing was “Beartooth Motionless in White,” which takes the artiness up to eleven. These bands should consider merging and changing their name to this.)

XRAWRX

Sound effect and illustration in one.

Yeti Set Go

This displays the same kind of wordplay as Petty or Not from a couple of weeks back, but with a different kind of celebrity. Cryptid pun for the win.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first four issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 28, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

How are we feeling about heading into 2020, not just a new year but an election year? If it helps with the anxiety, please know I’ll be here every week with a new list of band names. Not a cure, but it helps and gives me hope. For now, enjoy this last selection for 2019. New Year’s week is heavy on the tribute bands, which account for 3 out of 5 of my picks. As I noted last week, part of the fun of starting a tribute band must be coming up with a clever name.

Electric Boots

Rather than playing on a song title or the name of the artist for which it is a tribute, this extracted lyric perfectly evokes the whole Elton John aesthetic in two words.

Fleetwood Snack

Sometimes all you need is a taste. (Seems to be not so much a tribute band as a tribute name, but I like it either way.)

Love Vigilantes

Sometimes a song title needs no adjustment at all to become a band name, it only needs someone to claim it, like DIY justice for lovers done wrong.

Waves Like Weapons

Sound is a wave and has been used offensively at least since Joshua and the walls of Jericho.

We Don’t Know

Truer words were never spoken. Appropriate for all occasions.

 

One last thing before you go: Through December 31, I am participating in an authors’ “newsletter hop.” Subscribe to newsletters and answer trivia questions for a chance to win prize bundles of multiple books and stories, including my fantasy novels Daughter of Magic and Wizard Girl. If you want to play, go to my Facebook page for details.

I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first four issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 21, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

This is the first weekend this month with no commitments on the calendar. In spite of thin listings, there are plenty of appealing shows we could go to, but staying in is the most appealing activity of all. And since I’ve managed to catch a cold for Christmas, that is what we’ll do. If you’re looking for ideas, those thin listings yielded these precious gifts:

East of Friday

From the moment I had a concept of calendar time, I have pictured weeks, months, and years as a kind of map or game board with a definite directional aspect. If you head east from Friday, do you arrive at Saturday or Thursday? I say Thursday.

Heck Yes

Emphatically positive and keepin’ it clean.

Jaws Was Real

Jaws traumatized me when I saw it in the theater at the tender age of 11. I didn’t see it again until my late 30s when I watched it on the small screen with my kid (probably also 11-ish). He was not scared and I laughed so hard at the obvious fakery.

Oh Nothing

As a response to the question “What are you thinking about?” “Oh, nothing” is as likely as not to be true.

Petty or Not

Part of the fun of starting a tribute band must be coming up with a clever name. This one is a two-fer, with both wordplay and a sly indication that this is a tribute to Tom Petty and Fleetwood Mac.

One last thing before you go: Through December 31, I am participating in an authors’ “newsletter hop.” Subscribe to newsletters and answer trivia questions for a chance to win prize bundles of multiple books and stories, including my fantasy novels Daughter of Magic and Wizard Girl. If you want to play, go to my Facebook page for details.

I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first four issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 14, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

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Woodpecker in my yard

Is it beginning to look a lot like Christmas? It’s gray and raining and my back yard is full of birds, calling and feasting; I guess they think so. Also, my brother is performing a chapter of Finnegans Wake from memory tonight. This is the sixth year in a row, so something of a December tradition by now and the reason my weekend is booked up. But I always have time to celebrate band names, no matter the weather or the season. Here are this week’s picks:

The Amber Lanterns

Warm, old-timey light in the darkness.

Common Holly

Pretty, Christmas-y, invasive, functionally immortal. (Not a seasonal act, either, but well timed.)

The Feral Folk

What free-range kids grow up to be.

Mind of Joy

Intellect meets emotion on equal terms.

Yeehaw Junction

The world capital of whoopin’ and hollerin’. (Not only is this the name of a real place, more than one band is using it. This is not the bluegrass outfit from Charleston, but the punk outfit from Richmond that has been on a bill with Square Pig faves Dead Bars!)

One last thing before you go: Through December 31, I am participating in an authors’ “newsletter hop.” Subscribe to newsletters and answer trivia questions for a chance to win prize bundles of multiple books and stories, including my fantasy novels Daughter of Magic and Wizard Girl. If you want to play, go to my Facebook page for details.

I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first four issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 7, 2019

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

For someone who just wants to stay home in December and bake, I sure have a lot on my calendar this month! (“A lot” being defined as at least one event on any given weekend.) Alas, none of it appears to involve getting out to hear live bands, but I still plan to celebrate band names every week. Lots of goodies in this week’s listings:

After the Burial

As I Lay Dying

I probably would have chosen either of these alone, but finding them on the same bill made for an easy yes. The latter evokes an ill-advised Faulknerian quest; the former, an end to drama and heroics. (The listings had them in the logical order, which tells me they’ll play in the same comically horrible order presented here.)

The Aquadolls

Great retro vibe conjures up Seafairs of yesteryear and Esther Williams movies. I’m so pleased to learn this is, in fact, an all-female surf-punk band.

Criminal Squirrel Orchestra

Adorable little rogues making music? I’d watch that Saturday morning cartoon!

Power Strip

Shining the spotlight on a mundane piece of equipment lends it grandeur. Or this could be a particularly muscular burlesque act.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first four issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)