Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 2, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!


My superpower is finding things other people have lost. My good deed today was finding the lost piece of paperwork that my spouse needed from his parents’ files. This required a trip to Whidbey Island on a beautiful day (boo-hoo) so I’m late to the blog but ready as ever to laud these excellent band names:

Behold…the Arctopus

Maybe I’m just a punctuation nerd, but the ellipsis really makes this for me. The pause takes the faux-ancient grandiosity to a level of actual grandeur.

Disposable Zeros

So much nothing that they can be thrown away; yet what a difference if even one is added to your paycheck or removed from your rent.

Oceans of Slumber

So much sleep. I want it.

Scream along with Billy

Simultaneously cathartic and comforting because you’re screaming, but you’re doing it with at least one other. (Because of the format of the Times’ club listings, I was willing to believe the name was Scream along with Billy, Matt and Pat. Oh well.)

Two Horses Too Many

Homophones so close together are always fun, and the rhythm is actually better than the movie line from which it is drawn. Also, I didn’t know there was such a thing as a spaghetti-Western band, but I’m glad there is.

Shameless Self Promotion:

In case you didn’t know, I write about a lot more than band names! My young adult Daughter+of+Magic+eBook+Cover+edit+1fantasy novel Daughter of Magic released on May 22, 2018 from Not a Pipe Publishing! Ask for it at your favorite independent bookstore or order from Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

Luskell has been dreaming about dead people.

Her parents may be two most powerful wizards in the country, but Luskell doesn’t have any magic of her own, so she’s stuck spending a summer with her grandmother in the small town of Deep River where her father is the hometown hero. Then the dead start to visit her dreams with mysterious messages. In a secret pact with her friends Jagryn and Laki, Luskell begins to teach herself magic and discovers an apparently bottomless well of untapped power. But before she has control over this ability, her dead grandfather appears with a dire warning. With no way to send word to her parents, Luskell and her friends mount a daring rescue. Can they get to the capital in time to save the country … and her parents’ lives?

As part of the Year of Publishing Women, in 2018 Not a Pipe is publishing nine books by seven women; I’m honored to be one of them.

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