Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 11, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #17

facemask with message truth. justice. rock & roll.My love of clever band names gave rise to the fictional almost-all-girl garage band St. Rage, as featured in two of my novels (The Gospel According to St. Rage and Barbara and the Rage Brigade). What’s a band without merch? So I spent last weekend setting up an online shop to offer T-shirts, facemasks, etc. for St. Rage, as T-shirt with message: St. Rage Truth. Justice. Rock & Roll.well as my real band, T-shirt with image of pop-punk duo Your Mother Should Know as gross but lovable monstersYour Mother Should Know (provider of sounds for the St. Rage EPs). But I’m not about to stop celebrating band names. As promised on July 4, I continue with the second in a series of Americana-themed retrospectives. Be safe, wear your mask, and please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

American Authors

(February 8, 2020) I love it when music and literature collide! This is what I aspired to be from an early age. We’re mostly not rich and famous.

American Wrecking Company

(March 5, 2016) AKA party politics as usual. When the revolution comes, they will have brought it on themselves.

Lightning Kills Eagle

(March 14, 2015) This could be a Native American myth or a headline on a slow news day.

Mice Parade

(June 1, 2013) Cute as anything until they march into your pantry.

This American Knife

(April 14, 2019) Public radio, weaponized. Need to be on a bill with past honorees Ira’s Glasses.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first seven issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 13, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #13

I miss live music.

I rarely got out to a show, but I liked knowing it was possible any night of the week. I especially liked playing shows, partly because the best way to discover new bands is to be on a bill with them. So today, I honor a longer list than usual: a selection of bands who have been on a bill with Your Mother Should Know. Although we never played frequently even when we were actively getting out, this is not all of them. If you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

The Ancients

(August 11, 2012) I probably wouldn’t pick this name out of the listings, but it fits perfectly the band’s wildly theatrical Adventure Metal genre. These guys would be right at home with a tiny Stonehenge on stage.

Ancient Warlocks

(February 5, 2011) This appeals to my fantasy-novel side. Music and fiction are the closest to magic we can get: something out of nothing. It also evokes Spinal Tap and their tiny Stonehenge, and that makes me smile.

Black Plastic Clouds

(November 5, 2011) As if black clouds weren’t threatening enough! Any mention of black plastic reminds me of the ultimately ineffective weed barrier the previous owner of our house used in the front yard. We were digging pieces of black plastic out of the ground for years.

Curtains for You

(December 4, 2010) Full disclosure: I’d heard of this band years before I saw them at the Columbia City Theatre (which has a stage with actual curtains), and the keyboard player has visited my house. But I think I would list them even if that weren’t so. I like how the name references another era and aspect of American pop culture. (I tend to pronounce it “coitains” like the gangsters in old Bugs Bunny cartoons.) 

Dead Bars

(October 12, 2013) I’m surprised I haven’t included this one already, though I have referenced them a couple times. I actually know the story behind the name, which grew out of drinking in bars where there was no energy or excitement, nothing going on but drinking and thinking. If these guys are playing, the venue is automatically not a dead bar anymore.

Pouch

(July 2, 2011) I’ve been hearing about these guys and liked the name from the start. Pouch is one of those words that’s fun and funny to say. I hope to see more bands named for hand luggage.

The Tailenders

(February 25, 2012) This name implies a kind of loser pride, not ashamed to bring up the rear, hang off the back, sweep up the leavings — and maybe kick off the after-party, when the real fun happens.

Tyrannosaurus Grace

(August 11, 2012) This is one of those names that just sounds right. I don’t know what it is — some kind of Wesleyan dinosaur, I guess — but I like it.

Youth Rescue Mission

(February 25, 2012) Sing it with me: “My life was saved by rock and roll.”

Your Mother Should Know was already on indefinite hiatus before the lockdown but I hope we will be able to do some kind of livestream later in the summer. The next best thing is a solo outing (inning?) by my brother and bandmate Neal Kosaly-Meyer at 8 pm tonight on Facebook Live. He will play a short set of Your Mother Should Know originals and a few covers. I’ll be watching and probably singing along. Please join me!

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first six issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 25, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It’s been a quiet week of avoiding smoke and reading other people’s books before I dive back into my own work-in-progress. But after several weeks off, Your Mother Should Know is on schedule to begin recording our next two tracks, now that our practice space/studio is tolerably cool. Watch for “’68 Chevelle” and “Jerseyville,” coming soon!

Band names never rest, and these five caught my eye:

Bad Bad Hats

Would these be good hats? Because there are no bad hats, only bad hat owners.

Dead On Cue

Accuracy, or a specialized theatrical talent.

The Done Ones

Points for rhyming and being definite. They’re done. Don’t even start.

Gadgetor

Robot monster! Monster robot! It’s been awhile since I picked up that great B movie vibe.

Infinite Neck

A giraffe the size of the universe. It would still have seven cervical vertebrae, but would each one of them also be infinite?

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: On Saturday, October 6 at 2:00 p.m., I will be reading and signing my new fantasy novel Daughter of Magic at The Neverending Bookshop. Joining me will be Mikko Azul, author of The Staff of Fire and Bone. Come say hi!

Facebook event

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 11, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Glad to see the heat wave end, if only so Your Mother Should Know can practice and record again. We were willing to tough it out up to a point in our poorly ventilated space but couldn’t face it this week. Next week for sure! Till then, let’s talk about band names:

Earlier

No matter what time you show up, they will be there ahead of you, discovering the next cool thing.

Face Mason

I love the rhyme, but if you lay bricks this way you’re bound to get mortar up your nose.

Generation Decline

We can take comfort that every generation thinks everything’s gone downhill since their day.

Insect Ark

We’re gonna need a bigger boat just for the beetles.

Thrift Store Brats

Ah, my people! Or anyway, my protagonist’s. In The Gospel According to St Rage, Barbara’s as far from a mall rat as could be. She/I even wrote a song that begins, “Went to the thrift store with my best friend.”

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 4, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Good news! The end of the heat wave means Your Mother Should Know‘s practice space will be tolerable once more and we can continue our latest recording project. Preparing songs for recording means we’ve also assembled a pretty good set list, so you may see us out in public again in the near future. Meanwhile, here’s five who are out in public this week:

Calm Down Party

Just what’s needed after an anxiety-producing social workout.

Giraffes? Giraffes!

Q&A structure with only one word! The enthusiasm feels genuine, and warranted.

Narrow Tarot

Ear rhyme with no eye rhyme. I’ll assume the narrowness is of the cards and not the minds.

Ponder the Albatross

It’s right there, around your neck.

Trapped Under Ice

A week back, not a bad way to go. At least it’s cool down there.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-April 28, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Before I celebrate other bands, I need to share good news from my band, Your Mother Should Know. We released two new tracks this week and we’re pretty pleased with how they turned out. I present for your listening enjoyment “Fish Distributor”:

and “Ruined It (When You Hugged Me Back)”:

I think for the first time in almost 8 years of blogging, all 5 of my picks were playing on the same night. It happened to be last night so it’s too late to go out and hear them this time, but they are all deserving of applause. Watch for these in the future:

Bigfoot Formula

Like super-soldier serum but instead of turning you into Captain America, it turns you into Sasquatch. Better in a lot of ways.

Cold Soda

We had a couple of days this week where this would have been a legitimate choice. Less so today, but summer’s coming!

Head Band

Fashion accessory or boss ensemble of all ensembles? I suspect that would be harder than herding cats.

Sincere Engineer

The rhyme and the earnestness won me over. They look you in the eye and share the good news of thermodynamics and materials.

Teddy Bear Orchestra

The name evokes something that’s maybe TOO cute. Then you find out this is a band of robot teddy bears rocking out. Years ago I invented a robot singing group for a science fiction story, so there was no question of whether to include them.

 

Shameless Self Promotion: In case you didn’t know, I write about a lot more than band names! My young adult wizard fantasy novel Daughter of Magic releases May 22, 2018 from Not a Pipe Publishing and will be available for pre-order soon. As part of the Year of Publishing Women, in 2018 Not a Pipe is publishing nine books by seven women; I’m honored to be one of them.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 24, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

You know it’s really spring when you have several days of every kind of weather, sometimes all within an hour. Kind of it to be reasonably nice for March for Our Lives, but it still seems like a good weekend for indoor activities, such as going out to hear a band (or maybe a piano recital). These names sprouted up and caught my attention:

Epic Beard Men

Exactly what it says on the label. I appreciate the grandiose description of facial hair. This could be a Blood Bowl team; I’m thinking dwarves.

Mables Marbles

Toy company, children’s book, sculptor’s output, or what Mable is losing? Regardless, it’s fun to say. (I had already chosen this before I discovered that their bass player is none other than Ronnie Rodriguez, who figures prominently in the lyrics of “Tear-Shaped Bruise” by Your Mother Should Know (I play drums) and covered here by Dead Bars.)

Mind Beams

I want this superpower: the ability to project my thoughts without having to find the right words.

Racoma

Of course I will choose one that combines my favorite music genre with the City of Destiny, where I spent my first five adult years. Bonus points for going for the simplest spelling.

Shitty Person

This reminds me of a story my husband tells about being stranded by the side of the road and the sympathetic stranger who stopped to help. He spoke the same two words, “Shit, man,” as greeting, commiseration, and farewell, and is known around our house under his nom de  superhero, ShitMan.

Shameless Self Promotion: In case you didn’t know, I write about a lot more than band names! My young adult wizard fantasy novel Daughter of Magic releases May 22, 2018 from Not a Pipe Publishing. As part of the Year of Publishing Women, in 2018 Not a Pipe is publishing nine books by seven women; I’m honored to be one of them.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 21, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Considering how much time I spend thinking about bands and band names, it’s pretty rare for me to leave the house of an evening. (This is what being a middle-aged introvert does to you.) Tonight I’m taking part in an event that, while not strictly musical, is punk-rock in its own way. My brother and band-mate is a few years into a seventeen-year project of performing James Joyce’s Finnegans Wake one chapter at a time, from memory. This evening is a reprise of chapter 2, first presented in 2015. (Chapter 3 will be reprised on November 18 at Gallery 1412, and chapter 4 presented for the first time on December 16 at Chapel Performance Space.) Chapter 2 ends with a song and I’m helping out with the drum part; does that make it a Your Mother Should Know gig? Probably not, but I’ll bet the Wake is full of band names waiting to be harvested. Meanwhile, here’s the cream I skimmed from the club listings:

Golden Toads

Our massive random mix of everything includes a nature CD of frog and toad calls. These tracks tend to punctuate and reset whatever was going on before. Good to see our amphibian friends crossing over to play human venues.

Koo Koo Kanga Roo

Irresistible goofiness. And it rhymes!

Moral High Horses

When cliches collide, they both improve.

Superfun Yeah Yeah Rocketship

Unapologetic silliness launches it over the top.

The Wonderfool

Here’s one in the Joycean spirit. The fool can safely mock the monarch. The wonderfool works the miracle of getting the monarch to listen and act.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-October 14, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I’ve been on vacation this week, and spent part of the time recording two songs by St. Rage, the fictional teenage garage band featured in my debut novel The Gospel According to St Rage. (Thanks to Your Mother Should Know for sitting in for the fictional musicians.) In the book they record and release a 4-song EP, but three other songs are mentioned. We recorded one of them over a year ago: “Something of Mine,” which is about blood donation. Once these last two are finished, all three can finally get out into the world. It seems appropriate that I have an appointment to donate at Bloodworks NW this afternoon.

Blood donation precludes going out and standing up for hours, but I hope these well-named bands all draw appreciative crowds:

afterspace

Enjoying the typographical play: there is “space” but no space after “after”.

Bird Concerns

Food; water; mate; safe nesting space; clean windshield to mess up. Have I missed any?

Devoured by Flowers

From horror to beauty, the rhyme makes it an almost acceptable way to go.

ECHO OHs

Sonic and visual echoes built into the name!

Preyer

Comes across as more spiritual than predator, but someone else still gets eaten. (Also on the bill: Square Pig faves Power Skeleton!)

 

 

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 22, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Show of hands, who else went to the Eastlake Block Party? Take that, Capitol Hill! (Full disclosure: I played an early show at Victory Lounge with Your Mother Should Know and was home by 9:15 because I can’t do that many late nights or stand as long as I would have needed to catch Dead Bars at midnight, as much fun as I know that would have been. I’m sure there were plenty of younger, hipper people to carry the load.) None of this week’s band-name picks were at either block party, so I’m spreading the love around.

Alice Drinks the Kool Aid

Takes a sudden turn from surreal children’s book to real-life horror via cultish metaphor. I don’t want to imagine what happens to her.

Mhostly Ghostly

Only a little bit spooky. Has fun with rhymes and spelling.

Noonmoon

. . . in June? Darn, a month too late, but I still like it. A midday moon sighting always feels like a gift.

The Seafloor Cinema

Now I’m thinking of going to movies at the Neptune back when it was the repertory house. The aquamarine walls and oceanic decor made it feel like you were underwater.

The Selfimportantanators

This one is too long and nigh unpronounceable, and I respect that.