Square Pig in a Round Hole-May 8, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #60

Shameless Self-Promotion: Join me and The Neverending Bookshop this afternoon, May 8 at 3 pm PDT, for a live Zoom event for my most recent fantasy novel, Death’s Midwife (Daughter of Magic Book 3). Author LeeAnn McLennan will interview me about the history of the book and world-building, then I will read excerpts and take questions from the  audience. I will sign books ordered from Neverending during the event! More info and Zoom link here.

Appropriately enough, I’m continuing a series of posts celebrating fantasy and science-fiction themed band names. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Problem with Dragons
(March 21, 2015) I love the offhand way this diminishes terrifying and destructive creatures to the level of rodents or a leaky roof. Even so, with this kind of infestation, you’d better hope your pest control outfit has a wizard on staff.

Robotic About Us
(August 31, 2013) I’m partial to science fiction imagery generally, and I’m considering writing a robot romance, so this speaks to me.

ScienceFiction
(April 21, 2018) Speaking of sci-fi vibes … Searching old posts revealed how often I’ve used the term (17) even when not referencing this specific band.

Secret Superpower
(April 21, 2018) The protagonist of my garage-rock fairy tale The Gospel According to St Rage develops superpowers, which she can’t keep secret from her bandmates, but “The first rule of superpowers is parents can’t know about superpowers.” They won’t find out till the sequel.

Sedna
(March 26, 2011) I have a character named Sedna in the backstory of a science fiction novel, so I had to include this one. For my own sci-fi reasons, I’d like to see them on a bill with Out Like Pluto; if Pluto is out, Sedna’s even further out.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-May 1, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #59

I wasn’t kidding about how many sci-fi/fantasy themed band names I found! The celebration continues today and will go on for another 3 weeks. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Mind Beams
(March 24, 2018) I want this superpower: the ability to project my thoughts without having to find the right words.

Mythical Vigilante
(February 24, 2018) Who to call when you need to track down the villains of lore and legend.

Mythological Horses
(June 23, 2018) The hero’s horse rarely gets enough credit, even if it can fly. (This is the show I most wish I could get to. They’re on a bill with Square Pig faves Mud on My Bra and local legend Kurt Bloch is their guitarist!)

Old Man Wizard
(August 6, 2016) I’m also a fantasy writer, so always on the lookout for wizard references in the club listings. This one shines an impertinent spotlight on the high-fantasy trope of the silver-bearded sorcerer (you wouldn’t deprive an old man of his walking stick, would you?). For my part, I’m currently writing about a young girl wizard, just to begin evening things up. [Update: she now has a full trilogy. See below for details.]

The Outer Space Heaters 
(March 24, 2012) I’ve always thought “space heater” was an awfully cool name for a pretty mundane object. Now I see why.

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: Death’s Midwife (Daughter of Magic Book 3) is now available for purchase from your favorite independent bookshop or the usual online outlets. Join me and The Neverending Bookshop next Saturday, May 8 at 3 pm PDT for a live Zoom event featuring an interview, readings, audience Q&A, and more! RSVP here to receive the link.

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-April 17, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #57

I don’t know why I was ever surprised to find such a vast number of Science Fiction/Fantasy-themed band names. It’s the same kind of nerdy weirdos enjoying and creating both the fiction and the music. Sometimes, it’s the same individuals. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

The Dread Crew of Oddwood
(March 9, 2013) I love the old-fashioned usage of “dread” as an adjective for crew. It pairs well with the fantasy placename, Oddwood, and all those repeated Ds create a thumping alliteration.

Earth Control 
(January 17, 2015) I like plays on words that sound similar but are spelled nothing alike. This also gives off a science-fictiony vibe, which has perennial appeal for me.

From the Future
(August 22, 2015) What kind of science fiction writer would I be if I let this one slip past? It’s reassuring to know that the future will include such funky grooves. Personally, I’m a time-traveler from the past, traveling by record at 33 1/3 rpm. This method is slow and turns your hair gray.

Future Rainbow Lazer
(May 19, 2012) The best hippie/sci-fi baby name ever.

Girls Love Rockets
(February 28, 2015) Well, this one always did. From about the age of six, I thought it was pretty strange to assume female people weren’t interested in space, space travel, science fiction, etc. Because who wouldn’t be?

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: Death’s Midwife (Daughter of Magic Book 3) is now available for purchase from your favorite independent bookshop or the usual online outlets. Join me and The Neverending Bookshop on May 1 at 3 pm PDT for a live Zoom event featuring an interview, readings, audience Q&A, and more! RSVP here to receive the link.

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-April 10, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #56

At the intersection of my musical and literary interests is a nigh-bottomless well of Science Fiction/Fantasy-themed band names. (Try not to fall in.) I will be drawing from it for weeks! As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, get your vaccine, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Aruvius Thud
(May 18, 2013) I just love the way this sounds, like the name of a backwoods wizard.

Blame the Wizards
(April 23, 2016) Maybe that’s the explanation for the awfulness so far this year: a wizard did a spell, taking Prince and Bowie, but leaving Trump and Cruz. Damn wizards. [Update: we had no idea. Someone needs to have a word with those wizards.]

Chrononauts
(February 11, 2012) And as a science fiction writer, how could I not laud these sailors of the timestream?

Class M Planets
(June 30, 2018) I’m always pleased to find a nerdy sci-fi reference in the club listings. For those not in the know, we live on one.

Dragontail Peak
(June 29, 2013) This one hits my fantasy reader and writer spot. While you’re worrying about the dragon’s mouth, the tail will come around and take you out from behind.

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: Death’s Midwife (Daughter of Magic Book 3) is now available for purchase from your favorite independent bookshop or the usual online outlets. Join me and The Neverending Bookshop on May 1 at 3 pm PDT for a live Zoom event featuring readings, Q&A, and more! RSVP here to receive the link.

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 27, 2021

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #54

Mars is the only planet we know of that is entirely populated by robots. Outside of fiction, I think we’re probably better off keeping it that way; people make a mess. Happily, I did not run out of Mars-themed band names last week. In fact, there are enough for a  couple of bonus names! As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Long Day on Mars
(February 10, 2018) Sometimes I suspect bands of picking a name just to get my attention. Did they know I have an unpublished SF novel on my hard drive that includes a chapter about 3 space travelers on Mars, trying to get from their crashed shuttle to the base 90 km away before their oxygen runs out? It takes them more than one long day.

Your Mother Should Know at Sky Church, November 2011

Mars Red Sky
Oceans of Mars
(March 24, 2012) It’s Mars, OK? My imagination has spent a lot of time there lately. According to this picture, I even played a show there (possibly on the bed of a former ocean, under a red sky):

Martian Cult
(April 21, 2018) As a writer of speculative fiction, I’m always partial to a band name with a sci-fi vibe. Is this Earthlings following a charismatic leader from Mars, or Martians following an Earthling?

Mouse on Mars
(February 16, 2013) My instant reaction was memory of the Fun Forest, which I consider a good thing. In my mind, this name melds the roller coaster Mad Mouse with another ride called Flight to Mars. So, Seattle nostalgia plus my usual Mars-mania — an easy pick.

Stranger on Mars
(March 15, 2014) I imagine it will be a long time before this is not true, by definition, of anyone who gets there. But it can also be read as a comparative: “This music is strange enough on Earth, but it’s ever stranger on Mars.” [Sadly, this band no longer has an online presence. –ed.]

Uncommon Men from Mars
(April 20, 2013) Well, they would be. Mars needs women …?

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: Death’s Midwife (Daughter of Magic Book 3) is now available for purchase from your favorite independent bookshop or the usual online outlets. Join me and The Neverending Bookshop on May 1 at 3 pm PDT for a live Zoom event featuring readings, Q&A, and more! RSVP here to receive the link.

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first nine issues and subscribe here for future issues. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 14, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Pi Day in interesting times–a good excuse for comfort food. There were lots of shows in the coming week’s nightlife listings, but I would advise calling ahead to make sure your event is still on. If it isn’t, please consider buying the bands’ music and merch if available online. They will appreciate your support. Even if they don’t get to play, these bands have fabulous names:

Bad Honey

Must be a pet name for a misbehaving significant other, because actual honey rarely goes bad.

Boy Named Banjo

Anyone who played Oregon Trail knows how important the banjo was for morale. Totally deserving of its own name.

Everything Sux

You think so, and then you look up and everything is in bloom. We’ll get through this.

Uncanny Dandelion

The internal rhyme is an unexpected delight, as is the idea that something so common could also be weird.

Zorched Realm

Gives off a cracked Sci Fi/Fantasy vibe, like something from Spaceman Spiff.

Shameless self-promotion: With heavy hearts and abundance of caution, my fellow authors and I announce that the March 21 event at The Neverending Bookshop for  SHOUT: An Anthology of Resistance Poetry and Short Fiction is being rescheduled for summer. Please support independent bookstores by ordering a copy of this exciting collection. Twenty-five writers on the theme of resisting fascism/authoritarianism/nationalism. My story “Emma’s Knives” uses recipes as vehicles for coded messages of encouragement and instruction from grandmother to granddaughter in oppressed circumstances. Read my advance review here.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 8, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

This post is a day late due to family responsibilities, which has given me more time to consider the twice-yearly time-travel game we play. If we’re going to continue switching the clocks, we ought to come up with rituals for the observance of Time Change Eve and Time Change Day, even if only to raise a toast at sunset, spring ahead, and go to bed. And the first Monday of Daylight Saving Time should be a federal holiday. If the time change doesn’t bother you, though, there are lots of shows scheduled (but in this time of virus outbreaks, best to check that anything is still on before you head out). These band names stood out:

Boogie Boulevard

The party’s happening at the intersection with Electric Avenue, in Funkytown.

The Moonmen

Gidney and Cloyd?! Watch out for the scrootch gun.

Projections on a Wall

High-tech Plato’s cave: is that a real band up there, or is it a music video?

Worse in Person

A fine example of northwest loser pride, perfected with a rhyme that isn’t obvious until spoken aloud.

Year of the Fist

This is the year to kick the resistance into high gear, defiant fists raised high.

Shameless self-promotion: On Saturday, March 21, 2 pm at The Neverending Bookshop, I will join with other local authors to read from and sign SHOUT: An Anthology of Resistance Poetry and Short Fiction, the latest release from Not A Pipe Publishing. Twenty-five writers on the theme of resisting fascism/authoritarianism/nationalism. My story “Emma’s Knives” uses recipes as vehicles for coded messages of encouragement and instruction from grandmother to granddaughter in oppressed circumstances. Read my advance review here.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 29, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

A first! To date, this is the only Leap Day edition of Square Pig in a Round Hole. Several newspaper comics implied that February 29 is not a real day, which makes it the perfect day to either do nothin’ or else try something new. Whichever you choose, these band names are 100% real and all winners:

FRED

When I was a teenager (a startlingly large number of years ago), there was a Seattle punk band called Fred. I missed out on hearing them live but heard thrilling tales. This is not their triumphant return, but I’m pleased someone else thought Mr. Rogers’ first name was fitting for a music project.

Half Rushmore

Nothing but presidential chins.

New World Aviation Committee

I have a soft spot for names that are too long, especially when they sound official but don’t quite make literal sense.

Outhouse Confessional

A one-holer and a confessional booth are of similar size. Go in, shut the door, consider your human-animal nature.

Trebled Assets

When you check your collection of soprano instruments and there are three times more than you remembered.

 

Shameless self-promotion: Add this to your calendar now: On Saturday, March 21, 2 pm at The Neverending Bookshop, I will join with other local authors to read from and sign SHOUT: An Anthology of Resistance Poetry and Short Fiction, the latest release from Not A Pipe Publishing. Twenty-five writers on the theme of resisting fascism/authoritarianism/nationalism. My story “Emma’s Knives” uses recipes as vehicles for coded messages of encouragement and instruction from grandmother to granddaughter in oppressed circumstances. Read my advance review here.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 22, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I Go PogoIf election years make you anxious, I’m right there with you. Turn up the music and yell if it helps, and remember to vote. Personally, I Go Pogo, but since he’s not running this year, I’ll have to choose the next best candidate. Lots easier to choose these great band names:

Absynthe of Faith

Anyone who can nest puns within puns gets my vote. Worship the green fairy of electronica.

Batbox

Echolocation by means of high-pitched rhythmic mouthsounds.

Hippie Fight

It’s all groovy peace & love till they start a mosh pit.

Old Lady Litterbug

Besides how it describes an eccentric character, what I like about this one is the a-litter-ation. Sorry, I’ll see myself out.

Prodigal Sunburn

Returning home because he ran out of SPF 50 and no one would share.

 

Shameless self-promotion: Add this to your calendar now: On Saturday, March 21, 2 pm at The Neverending Bookshop, I will join with other local authors to read from and sign SHOUT: An Anthology of Resistance Poetry and Short Fiction. Twenty-five writers on the theme of resisting fascism/authoritarianism/nationalism. My story “Emma’s Knives” uses recipes as vehicles for coded messages of encouragement and instruction from grandmother to granddaughter in oppressed circumstances. Read my advance review here.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 8, 2020

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

20200208_135658Regular readers know that St. Rage is one of my favorite bands (and band names). Perhaps because I invented them and wrote and performed their songs. Well, today has been a very St. Rage kind of day: hat shopping in the morning, blood donation this afternoon. Before we move on to the real-life bands, here’s a little song about donating blood:

Thanks for your patience! On to this week’s honored five:

American Authors

I love it when music and literature collide! This is what I aspired to be from an early age. We’re mostly not rich and famous.

Franks and Deans

Wordplay + nostalgia = the Rat Pack’s favorite lunch.

Happy People Team

After this last week (or last 3 years), I know I need some positivity. And a reminder that we’re stronger–and happier–together.

Take It to Space

Way past over the top!

Tang

And what do we take to space, but what the astronauts drank!

Shameless self-promotion: Add this to your calendar now: On Saturday, March 21, 2 pm at The Neverending Bookshop, I will join with other local authors to read from and sign SHOUT: An Anthology of Resistance Poetry and Short Fiction. Twenty-five writers on the theme of resisting fascism/authoritarianism/nationalism. My story “Emma’s Knives” uses recipes as vehicles for coded messages of encouragement and instruction from grandmother to granddaughter in oppressed circumstances. Read my advance review here.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first five issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)