Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 1, 2018

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Right on schedule, it’s cool and overcast. But not raining, ironically good news for those attending Bumbershoot. I remember when tickets were $3.50 or $4; my spouse remembers when the event was free. If like us you can’t afford $100ish per day or $200ish for the whole weekend, there are still plenty of cheap shows out there. You might even encounter one of these bands:

Ceramic Animal

20180901_135852Nostalgia hit! As a child I had what we called my “breakable collection”–kitschy decorative ceramic animals (and some people). The only one with a practical use was a piggy bank (not square). When they inevitably fell on the floor and broke, I would glue them back together and restore them to their place of dusty honor. I still have a few.

Grizzly Business

By happy accident of English spelling, this has an ear rhyme with no eye rhyme, as well as a gorier sonic connotation. I prefer to picture bears in suits, doing what they do.

Maximum Mad

The Road Warrior’s full legal name.

Squarecrow

More fun with spelling! Us square critters gotta stick together, but crows are never anything but cool.

What’s Wrong

Where to start? Alternatively, if what is wrong, maybe you meant who. (And they were on a bill with Square Pig faves Mud on My Bra!)

 

Shameless Self-Promotion: On Saturday, October 6 at 2:00 p.m., I will be reading and signing my new fantasy novel Daughter of Magic at The Neverending Bookshop. Joining me will be Mikko Azul, author of The Staff of Fire and Bone. Come say hi!

Facebook event

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 5, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

We braved the heat and smoke last night to go out to Cafe Racer, where we got to run through a sprinkler to reach the entrance. We were rewarded with a fun, free punk show featuring past Square Pig honorees Klondike Kate and Mud on My Bra!, as well as Juicy Thompson and the Snuggle Regime and Porn Bloopers, both of whom I am surprised not to have written about before. I’ll have to keep them in mind for the future because this week’s list is already full:

Blistered Earth

What with the high temps and the wild fires and the global warming, if Earth had skin, it would be blistered by now.

Ghost of a Dead Hummingbird

Poignant and strange. I like that the name is so long in honor of such a tiny spirit.

King Dome

With the words separated it seems to be about a monarch but if you’ve lived here long enough, you know better. Never been anywhere louder.

Secret Super Power

I’m always pleased to find a band name that runs up against my fiction interests. (My debut novel, The Gospel According to St Rage, features a high school girl who starts a garage band and gains superpowers.) Everybody wishes for superpowers but few who have them can afford to go public.

Up is the Down is the

Joycean circularity with a nice waltz rhythm.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-April 15, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Thank you, Seattle weather, for turning nice just in time for the Tax March, Black Lives Matter March, and Easter weekend! We’ll try not to forget this when the rain returns sooner rather than later. In addition to a basket of five splendid band names, my Easter gift to anyone reading this is a an original story. Official release is tomorrow, but go ahead and enjoy it now. Meanwhile, those band names:

3-Piece Bikini

The dapper and businesslike look for the beach.

Broke in Stereo

When you move in together to save on expenses, but neither of you has any money to begin with.

Cranky Babies

Toddlers are the original punks. Makes me think of my favorite Jonathan Richman song, “Not Yet Three.”

A Heart in the Stillness

A tiny poem for moments like Holy Saturday, when the world holds its breath.

Trapdoor Social

Introverts’ escape hatch.

Coming Soon:

On Tuesday, April 18, Your Mother Should Know is on a bill at the Sunset with Mud on My Bra and Strange Like Us. I’ll be playing drums and singing, including three songs I wrote for my novel The Gospel According to St Rage.

Facebook Event

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 4, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Though there are tons of well-named bands this week, I won’t be going out tonight; I managed to catch my first cold in close to a year. I don’t feel great, but I’ve had worse, so I’m pretending I’m well.

This weeks picks:

Lonesome Home

A melancholy paradox. Also note how the words end with the same three letters but different sounds.

Strange Like Us

“Strange” implies rarity while “us” implies group identity. You don’t have to be popular to belong. (In a happy turn of events, Strange Like Us will join Square Pig faves Mud on My Bra! and my own band Your Mother Should Know for a show in April at the Sunset. Watch for details!)

Uneasy Chairs

A seat that isn’t merely uncomfortable; it’s worried.

The Velveteen Rabbit Hole

I picked this for the children’s book references before I knew it was a Velvet Underground cover band. Now I like it twice as much.

Villain of the Story

Authors love to write them. Actors love to play them. Musicians love to be them, I guess?

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 14, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It’s warming up and also not raining! Get out and hear some music. Or stay home and make some music. Or get ready to march.

Decent at Best

Like music or literature, band names fall into various genres. I would put this one under Northwest Loser Pride (a personal favorite). Whether honest assessment or an attempt to keep expectations low, this lets everybody off the hook.

Great Good Fine OK

“How are you?” isn’t typically a multiple-choice question, but maybe it should be.

Grip Tape

Honoring a humble substance without which countless drumsticks would be flung into the mosh pit.

Marching Church

It’s time to get out of the sanctuary and take the gospel to the streets.

Mud on My Bra

I applaud the unapologetic feminism tucked into this punk-af name. Nothing about your gender, anatomy, or underwear should stand in the way of doing what gives you joy.