Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 7, 2021

Cartoon image of a pink square pig in a round hold

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times nightlife listings for abundant source material!

(Until live music returns, I am curating retrospective posts from past material. Dates indicate when the band was originally featured.)

SQUARE PIG IN A ROUND HOLE PANDEMIC EDITION #72

Just a few weeks ago, I was excited for the imminent return of live music. Now I foresee a new season of events being scheduled, then postponed or cancelled; of venues reopening and almost immediately closing down again. I really hope I’m wrong! Meanwhile, the food-and-beverage theme continues with a mostly-summery collection. As ever, wash your hands, wear your mask again, get your vaccine if you haven’t already, and if you are able, please buy these bands’ music and merch while we wait for a better day.

Plastic Picnic
(March 18, 2017) Toy food in a playhouse satisfies until it doesn’t. Is this where chefs come from?

Pop Sickle
(January 11, 2014) The quiescently frozen confection that kills it every time.

Puff Puff Beer
(February 25, 2017) How to bro in three easy steps.

Shaggy Sweet
(July 20, 2015) The five-second rule is voided if the dropped candy collects fuzz.

The Shaken Growlers
(March 7, 2015) I can easily believe this name grew out of an unfortunate incident bringing beer home from the bottle shop. Promises an exuberant, messy time.

 

Two last things before you go:

  1. My new thing in 2021 is The Rage Brigade, a Facebook group for conversation about fantasy, science fiction, superheroes, and music (and the intersections thereof). If that sounds like fun, come join us here.
  2. I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, upcoming events, and other goodies, including “Wizard in the Mosh Pit,” an exclusive short story just for subscribers. Click the link to check out the first ten issues and subscribe here for future issues. The July 2021 issue includes an excerpt from Barbara and the Rage Brigade. (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-March 18, 2017

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It may seem like the rain will never end, spring will never come, and everything keeps getting worse. But! We had a sunny day last week, hyacinths are blooming, and daffodil sightings have been reported. On top of that, there is still music to make and hear, and band names to celebrate. For example:

Dead Man Winter

A seasonal character who has overstayed his welcome; always old, nearly expired. (Bonus: the bandleader is also associated with past honoree Trampled by Turtles, of whom I wrote on September 8, 2012: I love this image, because of the slow speed. Anything heavy enough to do any damage, you could just roll out of the way. I picture some poor dude, passed out and engulfed by turtles. [N.B. Since this post, I have invented a fictional band called Plague of Turtles, no doubt inspired by this image.])

The Galaxytones

As retro-futuristic as the Space Needle.

Plastic Picnic

Toy food in a playhouse satisfies until it doesn’t. Is this where chefs come from?

Tiny Bones

In high school, my sister reassembled a frog’s skeleton and encased it in Lucite. Ever since, I have been fascinated by how small bones can be, whether in wee animals or our own ears.

Yawning Man

A deliberately boring arts festival in the desert. Everybody catches up on their sleep.