Author: kareneisenbreywriter

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 25, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Last night, the spouse and I actually went to a show! Thanks to Myla Mud of Mud on My Bra for putting on a great birthday show at Cafe Racer, a weird and welcoming space walking distance from Square Pig HQ. We hadn’t heard any of the bands before and didn’t expect to know any of the musicians, so of course the fiddle player in Merchant Mariner was someone we’ve known for years. Sometimes Seattle is still a small town. And a bottomless well of band names, such as:

Date Night with Brian

This sounds like a goofy rom-com about lowering expectations and doing something you like with someone who likes you. (I first encountered them when they followed me on Twitter, a big deal because I have only 14 followers. So I was pleased to see them come up in the club listings so soon.)

Nine Pound Shadow

I choose to believe it’s a cat or other modest-sized mammal, not something that’s going to ARRGGGHHH . . .

The Octopus Project

Professional respect. The octopus, like the writer, is reclusive, clever, and if threatened, disappears in a cloud of ink.

Puff Puff Beer

How to bro in three easy steps.

The Snubs

The third band from Myla’s birthday provides the much-needed fifth entry. It manages to sound both punchy and elitist. Extra points for performing in matching masks and beanies.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 18, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Although it’s technically still winter, it’s looking a lot like spring: 44 degrees and raining, crocuses poking up, sunrise earlier every day. Another thing to give us hope, along with the unruly herd of cats we call America, and of course, band names.

Another Lost Year

It’s early enough in 2017 that a lot of people still feel bitter about 2016. Those who don’t might think again as they begin to work on their taxes.

Far Out West

The collision of three small words and two geographical phrases imparts grooviness to where we are.

Oceans Ate Alaska

A climate change prediction. The sea will still be hungry when it’s finished with Florida.

ohmme

A mantra, a mild cry of distress, or a cleverly veiled call for resistance?

Why Don’t We

This unfinished suggestion leaves all possibilities open.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 11, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

We’ve had our snow. That’s enough winter; now can we move on to spring? Based on the intense twittering the past couple of days (nothing to do with the so-called president) I’d say the local birds are ready, too. While we wait for the flowers, there are always band names to bring us joy.

Basement Surfers

When your friends either take up temporary abode on your lower level, or make recreational use of your flooded cellar.

Ergo I Exist

It takes up Decartes’ formula in the middle, leaving the question open as to how you know.

Noisegasm

Creative soundmaking as ecstatic sensual experience. My external memory (AKA spouse) reminded me that we heard this group a couple years ago, but somehow I had missed including them in the blog until now.

Pkew Pkew Pkew

Someone took the time to figure out a spelling for a sound effect that has both aural and visual appeal.

Spooky Action

This name, a gift from quantum physics, also aptly describes this duo’s comically uncanny real-time art-and-music performance. I’ve hoped to include them since I saw them last month at Seattle Composers’ Salon.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-February 4, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Apologies in advance to everyone who has gigs tonight. I won’t be gracing you with my presence this evening; I donated blood today and there’s a pretty good chance I’d faint. Fortunately, I can appreciate band names without even leaving the house.

Drea & the Marilyns

Always happy to see classic X and the Y structure, but I chose this one for entirely personal reasons. My mother was a Marilyn and my first musical influence. It’s time for the name to make a comeback.

Hollerado

Metasota

How are these two not on the same bill? (Y’know, besides playing in different genres.) I like how neither obviously references a state name until read aloud.

Leopold and His Fiction

A variation on classic X and the Y structure. As I discovered writing real songs for a fictional garage band, even real musicians have a fictional aspect while performing.

Pigeons Playing Ping Pong

This one gets in for the repeated “P” sounds, the humorous image, and the bouncing rhythm. Maybe also because we have a bucket of ping pong balls in our music studio.

I’ll close with some good advice for musicians and audience alike:

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 28, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

After only a week of this new administration, I have to say thank your deity of choice there are still books to write and music to make. Art will save my sanity, and I’m sure I’m not alone. Which is kind of the point: we’re not alone, and having made art to preserve our sanity, together we can preserve our republic. The resistance will be led by park rangers, scientists, artists, and social media interns. Band names will also play their part.

Boy on Guitar

Add girl on drums; what more do you need? (In a sweet irony, their Facebook profile pic shows a girl on guitar. Well played.)

Into the Storm

Smooth Sailing

I picked these two partly because they are on the same bill; I love appropriate pairings. They represent in a few words the two extremes of our watery surroundings. Endearing tidbit: one of these bands has a song called “Galloping Gertie.” It isn’t Into the Storm.

Neu Yeuth

Fun with spelling! Although these are not English words, the pronunciation is obvious. Coincidentally, they’re on the same bill with:

Satchmode

Nice name-drop pun. “In the manner of Armstrong.”

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 21, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I decided not to go to the Womxn’s March on Seattle because I remembered in time that large, slow-moving crowds unnerve and aggravate me. I’m glad it was nice day for it, though–looks like the turnout was bigger than expected! Anyone in a functional band can tell you: we’re stronger together. And no administration can stop the band names.

’68

So short and so simple–amazing how evocative an apostrophe and two digits can be! And also how much noise two people can make when they set their minds, drums, and guitars to it. My own duo decided this week to work up a song called “’68 Chevelle”, so this was a natural pick.

General Vicinity

In which a contextless conventional phrase transforms into a Star Wars character.

Luau Cinder

Thanks to my mom, a basketball fan from way back, I get the pun. This is more than just a blackened lump of pork.

Lumphead

A truly Pogoesque insult or endearment.

Thursday Night Book Club

Where you tell your kids you’re going as you leave for band practice.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 14, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It’s warming up and also not raining! Get out and hear some music. Or stay home and make some music. Or get ready to march.

Decent at Best

Like music or literature, band names fall into various genres. I would put this one under Northwest Loser Pride (a personal favorite). Whether honest assessment or an attempt to keep expectations low, this lets everybody off the hook.

Great Good Fine OK

“How are you?” isn’t typically a multiple-choice question, but maybe it should be.

Grip Tape

Honoring a humble substance without which countless drumsticks would be flung into the mosh pit.

Marching Church

It’s time to get out of the sanctuary and take the gospel to the streets.

Mud on My Bra

I applaud the unapologetic feminism tucked into this punk-af name. Nothing about your gender, anatomy, or underwear should stand in the way of doing what gives you joy.

 

Square Pig in a Round Hole-January 7, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

And now we emerge, squinting, into a bright new year; hoping for the best, fearing the worst. What can we rely on to lift our spirits? Band names, that’s what. Out of this week’s abundance, I mined these five gems:

Dot Comet

I’m a sucker for a name that starts out one way, then makes a quick turn into something else. As a bonus, this one gives me an excuse to trot out an old family joke. “Look! Comet Kohoutek!” (You have to be a certain age to get that one.)

Fuss & Holler

I like the backwoods vibe. This could be a pair of strong verbs, a cleverly named duo, or (by sound, not spelling) a place to go flippercootin’.

mustrd.

I have to respect an abbreviation created by removing one vowel and adding a period so it isn’t actually shorter by character count.

Springtime Carnivore

Summer Cannibals

These two are playing on the same night but not on the same bill. I can’t help thinking the former becomes the latter at the summer solstice; probably safest to hear them in January.

Square Pig News: I’m newly on Twitter! I’m not really sure what to do with it besides share each segment of the post as a tweet. We’ll see.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 31, 2016

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

How better to see out 2016 than with a celebration of band names? In a year that seemed to have no end of bad news*, this weekly roundup of creative thought in the local music scene gave me something to smile about on a regular basis. Here, then, are the final five of 2016, with a bonus special mention.

The Considerate A-holes

Subtract a tw0-letter prefix from a common, sputtered complaint to create an oxymoron, a classic form of band name.

The Laughing Group

I’m picturing a sober business firm founded 1916 by Mr. J. J. Laughing, a man who never smiled.

Naked Walrus

The funniest part of this is imagining a clothed walrus.

Perfect by Tomorrow

Wow, that’s some resolution!

Rocket Coma

As a science-fiction writer, I’ve spent a certain amount of time thinking about long space journeys and how to make them tolerable and cost effective. We throw around words like hibernation, statis, hypersleep. This is a blunter way to put it.

Bonus special mention:

It Gets Worse

I featured this band exactly two years ago, in my last post of 2014. At that time, I wrote: “A simple and obvious play on the It Gets Better campaign, but so punk and so often true.” Now it looks like an honest prediction of how 2017 might compare to 2016. Please, no.

*I can’t be too down on a year that brought my first published novel into the world, but I know a lot of people who can’t wait to see 2016 gone. Seriously, though, if you believe in Truth, Justice, Rock & Roll, check out The Gospel According to St Rage.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-December 24, 2016

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It’s Christmas Eve and I have lots to do to get ready for tomorrow, but first let me slip a handful of band names into your stocking. They are the gift that apparently never stops giving.

For Now

A simple little phrase that could mean temporary, provisional, lent not given; or else in the moment, for this time and no other.

Goat Reward

Whether the goat receives the reward or is the reward, this was strange and funny enough to catch my eye.

Marina and the Dreamboats

This one has everything: classic X and the Y structure; the repeated long-e sound to aurally link the bandleader to the band; a thematic link between boats and where you dock them; and a promise of dreaminess.

Old Outfits

I mostly shop at thrift stores so even my new outfits are old. Then I wear them till they fall apart. But an outfit can also be an organization, like, say, a band. One that has been around a while, or includes aged participants, would therefore be . . .

Schadenfreuders

Using a German word automatically makes it more dramatic and also goofier. Of course it helps that German has a single word for “taking pleasure at the misfortune of others.” Twisting it into those who take that pleasure is the cherry on top.