Author: kareneisenbreywriter

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 3, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

67340208_10215080709550518_3444971926429106176_nWhat a week it has been! I got my author face out in public for a reading to launch Wizard Girl; celebrated my 56th birthday by walking home from work on a beautiful day (about 5 miles); recorded a couple demos of new St. Rage songs; enjoyed a recital of modern vocal music; and now I’m on vacation! On top of all that, I get to lift up these five fine band names:

Bragrat

When a typo becomes a character. This rodent has no lack of confidence and will tell you all about it.

Clandestine Beam

Poetic oxymoron. No one lights a lamp, then hides it under a basket.

Jack and the Dull Boy

I like this one both for the classic X and the Y structure and for the creepy literary reference. (It appears to be an actual two-piece, too. Not sure which one is Jack, but their demo is not dull.)

Rather Ordinary Dudes

A humble, aw-shucks attitude to balance Bragrat, who are on the same bill.

Schmutzhund

Fierce guard dog has a dirty face. Granny licks her handkerchief.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 27, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Wizard Girl cover imageI will lead off with Shameless Self Promotion: My new fantasy novel, Wizard Girl (sequel to 2018’s Daughter of Magic) released this week! I’m tickled beyond belief to be reading and signing TONIGHT at 7 pm at Third Place Books–Ravenna. Details here. I hope to see both familiar and unfamiliar faces in the audience. Come ask me some wacky question I’ve never thought about before (as long as it’s appropriate for an all-ages crowd).

But we’re all really here for band names. Once again, the listings do not disappoint:

Bensbeendead.

Ben, to universe: Is that all you got?

(Also digging the period at the end of the sentence.)

Divorce Care

You could join a support group. Or you could go to a punk rock show and mosh to keep from crying. Careful, though; you might end up with a tear-shaped bruise.

Have Patience

If your online date doesn’t get your sense of humor, move on. Take your time. Your own personal weirdo is out there.

It Looks Sad.

Or forget online dating. Give in to those big puppy eyes and rescue a dog. (Also, another complete sentence with a period at the end! Is this a new trend in band names?)

Johnny and the Moles

The sound from the underground. You can’t go wrong with classic X and the Y structure.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 20, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I will show my age by saying I remember the first moon landing, 50 years ago today. I was almost 6 and completely captivated by the idea that people were walking on the moon I was looking at. We’re going out tonight for an early celebration of my next birthday (do the math). This break in the weather means we’ll probably see the moon on our way home. We plan to avoid Block Party, so probably won’t see any bands, but you never know. That won’t prevent me from celebrating these five:

Highest of Heels

Could be a pair of ridiculously uncomfortable shoes. I’m going with a superlatively hoity-toity villain.

Sparks+Front+Cover+eBook+finalHorse Jumper of Love

There really is someone for everyone. This also gives me a chance to plug Sparks, a delightful fantasy romance set on an Oregon horse farm, releasing in late July from Not A Pipe Publishing. Read my advance review here and pre-order now!

Long Shorts

I love a good oxymoron. On the one hand, which is it? On the other hand, sometimes you don’t want to show your knees, even in summer.

Rock Paper Sun

This contest seems rigged.

Stay Grounded

Solid advice in stressful times; a terse order that lets you know you’re still in trouble with Mom; or the reason we haven’t gotten back to the moon.

Wizard Girl cover imageShameless Self Promotion: My next fantasy novel, Wizard Girl (sequel to 2018’s Daughter of Magic) releases next Tuesday, July 23! I’m having an online launch party that day from 2-6 pm Pacific time. Join us here for any or all of the festivities. On Saturday, July 27, I’ll be reading and signing at 7 pm at Third Place Books–Ravenna. Details here.

And one last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check out the first three issues and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 13, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

St Rage 01The power of a good band name: A few years back, my blogging and fiction worlds converged when I saw a sign for a storage place with the O burned out. “St. Rage” seemed like a great name for a band, and I happened to have a fictional character on hand who wanted to start one. My first novel, a garage-rock fairy tale titled The Gospel According to St. Rage, released 3 years ago tomorrow and will be re-released in a slightly buffed-up 2nd edition in August. I have been writing and learning new St. Rage songs, which with any luck will be recorded and ready for performance in time for the  November launch of the sequel, Barbara and the Rage Brigade. While we wait, take a listen to the songs that are already out here. And give some love to these powerful band names:

Double Play

The Home Team

Root, root, root! I’m always happy to find multiple bands in the same week whose names have a common theme. This time I noted three with a baseball theme, and I had only picked one of them previously (Chance to Steal). Also happy to learn Double Play is a two-piece because that’s as perfect as a well-turned double play.

Hoity-Toity

This little rhyme is my favorite for humorously dismissing someone who is putting on airs without really insulting them. Also, this is a 4-piece all-girl band, just like St. Rage (at least before they added Travis on bass. It’s in the book.)

In the Drink

What a marvelous name for a bar band from watery Seattle, made even more perfect by the venue: The High Dive.

Porpoise Parade

A Seattle tradition, the next Seafair event after the Pirate’s Landing and the Milk Carton Derby.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out (Issue 3 is just out!) and subscribe here for future issues.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 6, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Itty Bitty cover imageA Thursday holiday confuses the whole week, so I’m thankful for my Saturday blog to get the routine back on track. I will be stepping out of the routine a little bit this afternoon to launch Itty Bitty Writing Space, a collection of over a hundred tiny stories in a variety of genres by as many authors. My contribution imagines a house haunted by pianos instead of ghosts. Two local authors, Helen Carothers and I, will be reading, signing, and talking about the project at 3:30 pm at The Neverending Bookshop in Edmonds. If you’re in the area, come say hi!

Speaking of tiny literary efforts, I present these five band names worthy of celebration:

Elvis Batchild

Almost-plausible character name ripped from the tabloids.

Nick Shoulders and the Okay Crawdad

This one appeals to my lifelong fondness for the word “crawdad” and I’m glad it is okay. Extra points for using classic X and the Y structure for an “occasional one-man band.”

The Odd Kids

My people! Does any other kind of kid end up in a band?

Then Bang

How appropriate for the days following July 4! Also an appropriately short, sharp way to indicate a sudden occurrence.

Token Girl

I’ve played enough shows where I was the only woman onstage that I celebrate when there’s two of us, and remember that one great show where we outnumbered the men.

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out and subscribe here for future issues–the next one is out this week and will be full of exciting news.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Review: Sparks

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Sparks+Front+Cover+eBook+finalSparks by Maren Anderson (July 2019 Not A Pipe Publishing)

Romance, monsters, and magic … for grownups? Yes, please!

It’s a treat to find a good fantasy novel aimed at adult readers. Sparks is just such a book. Nothing against YA, which I love, but I like the idea of someone with life experience and responsibilities encountering magic in the midst of an otherwise ordinary life. I also enjoyed the setting: contemporary West Coast farm country, not the usual venue for tales of monsters and magic.

Rosie, a widow in her late 30s, owns a ranch where she boards horses and offers riding lessons. She loves her life but she’s deep in debt. She has plans to train five mustangs, which will help pay the bills. But first she needs to build a round pen, and the only good place for it is occupied by a century-old cowshed. A cowshed that does not want to be torn down. Things are complicated further by the arrival of Patrick, a handsome stranger with a beautiful horse and a mysterious past. Skeptical, unsuperstitious Rosie has a big adjustment to make as genuine magic enters her life, and not only from the cowshed.

The book has a nice balance of humor, romance, and suspense as Rosie and Patrick team up to figure out what is in the cowshed and how to get rid of it. Things get worse before they get better—much worse for some characters—until the surprising, satisfying conclusion. Recommended for fans of fantasy romance, mythical creatures, and horses.

Hardcover HERE

Trade Paperback HERE

Kindle Edition HERE

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 29, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

A most Seattle morning: breakfast at Beth’s Cafe, a walk around Green Lake, then a visit to Reckless Video, the last independent video store in town. I highly recommend all these activities, as well as these fine band names:

Dirtnap

It’s death, isn’t it? A cozy, comfortable end.

Green Lake Basement

Real local flavor–that slightly musty smelling underground apartment/practice space, walking distance to Beth’s.

Polar Echo

There’s a kind of elaborate mirage that results from low sun reflecting off ice. This implies the same thing happens with sound.

The Silver SnailsKalakala

The Kalakala’s backing band.

 

Morels 3-30-2014Trebled Morels

Even one morel is a miracle, but three? Heaven. (These came from our yard 5 years ago: doubly trebled!)

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out and subscribe here for future issues–the next one is out in July and will be full of exciting news.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 22, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

20190621_043055
Me at 4:30 am on June 21, at wordcount zero of an eventual 5,213

Summer is here! I know, because it’s kind of warm and the sky is gray. Also because I spent yesterday, the summer solstice, participating in The Longest Day to raise funds for Alzheimer’s research and support. I was part of a team, Writing Against the Darkness, that pledged to write from dawn till dusk. In Seattle, that’s like 17 hours; a long day, indeed. Even with a 6-hour break to go to work, I wrote 5,213 words (a lot for me; I am a slow writer) and raised over $1300. The team produced a total 55,469 words and raised over $5000. An exhausting day but well worth it! It is not too late to donate to this worthy cause if you feel so moved. My donation page is here.

During a couple of my breaks, I took time to pick a stellar crop of band names:

Minivan Morrison

Carpool parent singing along with classic rock.

Neither Bears nor Forest

Weirdly poetic turn of phrase for something that isn’t what it purports to be.

Sidewalks and Skeletons

More like trick-or-treat than end-of-school. Then again, no matter the time of year, everyone on the sidewalk has inside them a spooky, scary skeleton. (Happy coincidence: S and S is from Bradford, UK, the birthplace of my spouse’s grandfather.)

The Pietasters

My dream job. I’ll need another sample of the rhubarb, please.

Time Pieces

Clocks and watches, minutes and seconds, measures and beats.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out and subscribe here for future issues–the next one is out in July and will be full of exciting news.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 15, 2019

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Wizard Girl cover imageI’m in a bit of a tizzy because the cover of my next book was revealed this morning. Wizard Girl (Daughter of Magic Book 2) will release from Not A Pipe Publishing on July 23. E-book is on pre-order now with paperback and hardback to follow soon. Learn more here.

I hope these bands rock as much as this cover. As I went through the listings, nothing was speaking to me until the last page, where I encountered five great names on one bill. I think this is the first time that has happened.

Against the Raging Tide

Heroic brooding outsider drama.

Antlerbag

Murse for a moose (because he doesn’t have hands to hold a handbag).

Earth to Ashes

I’m reading this as a statement about climate change, like that Bill Nye video where he set a globe on fire.

Felony Flats

Old West town at the end of the line, entirely populated by criminals who have created a supportive community for themselves.

Stranded by Choice

In another break with tradition, I’m including a band I’ve featured before in order to cover the whole bill. On June 17, 2017, I wrote: “Love the double meaning. Are we stuck because of too many options, or intentionally moving to a deserted island?”

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out and subscribe here for future issues–the next one is out in July and will be full of exciting news.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-June 8, 2019

· Leave a comment ·

Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It was fun to get out of town last Saturday, but it’s nice to have a more normal weekend where the only thing I had to leave the house for was a trip to Fred Meyer to buy a shower curtain. On the way home, we decided Showerkraut would be a good name for a band. If I see it in the listings, I will give a shout-out here. Meanwhile, these real band names rose to the top:

Birdcop

After Bad Cop intimidates you and Good Cop softens you up with sympathy, this character craps on your head and flies off with your sandwich.

Dead by Wednesday

RIP Pugsley Addams. She finally succeeded.

Escape Train

While fast and durable, this vehicle makes it hard to elude pursuit.

Museum of Light

So beautiful, I almost missed the pun on our local aircraft exhibit. This is a church sanctuary at dusk, stained glass aglow.

ufo ufo

Whispered alert of alien invasion.

 

One last thing before you go: I share highlights from this blog in my quarterly author newsletter, The Storypunk Report, as well as news of what I’m writing and reading, and other goodies. Click the link to check it out and subscribe here for future issues–the next one is out in July and will be full of exciting news.  (Or just follow the blog for your weekly dose of band names.)