Author: kareneisenbreywriter

Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 23, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It must really be fall: last weekend, we turned off the AC, then three days later, we turned on the heat. Also, there’s stuff going on every night of the week, some of it involving music, and much of that, thank deity-of-choice, involving band names. These five caught my attention this week:

Fashionism

Style we can believe in. (I’m an anti-fashionist myself, but I’ll make an exception here.)

Herb & Jellyfish

Music duo or tomorrow’s cuisine from warming oceans? None of those rural jellyfish for us.

Lost Eyedentity

Reminds me of that time they had me take off my glasses for a driver’s license photo. It’s a good picture but I don’t recognize me.

Serpentent

When you’re sorry you talked to snakes.

Swedish Finnish

Happy chance that one letter turns it from a flooring choice to the heritage of at least one of my friends.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 17, 2017

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Square Pig

Naming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically.

Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

It was still summer on Friday when we drove across the state to take one of our young adults to Eastern Washington University. Early Saturday morning, it was cold enough for frost at the Turnbull National Wildlife Refuge. Today, it’s raining again in Seattle; summer is officially over even though we’re still a few days from the equinox. Fortunately, band names know no season. Here are this week’s favorites:

At Both Ends

I’m too old to live this way anymore, but I respect the hold-nothing-back attitude.

Bobaflex

Bounty hunter discovers the real money is in exercise equipment.

Caked Up

Literal sugar high, with candles on top. (See above, At Both Ends.)

Harmful If Swallowed

Equally applicable to chemicals, flattery, campaign promises, or a box of hammers.

Orphaned Land

A whole melancholy story in only two words.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 9, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I made the mistake of trying to participate in two events in one weekend. The Friday one was so good, I had to leave the Saturday one early or risk falling over. Note to self: playing a gig and staying out till 1 am drains both physical and social energy for the whole next day. Sorry, Readerfest; I hope everyone else is having a good time. (It goes till 6 p.m., so you can still make it if you hurry!) But band names wait for no blogger, so here they are:

Black Doubt

Looks like a slough of despond, sounds like what happens when you throw back a few too many. And I can’t overlook how it seems to refer to a song by Your Mother Should Know, which we performed last night.

Cape Disappointment

The place names around here reveal that Northwest loser pride goes way back.

Coast Modern

Ultracool and stylish yet laid-back and chill. Baffles the heartland.

Smoke Season

Eerily topical after the week we’ve had. Please tell me it’s almost over.

YURT

Although I’m a fan of band names that are hilariously too long, I’m also fond of monosyllables, especially those that denote snugness. (See also Pouch.)

Square Pig in a Round Hole-September 2, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I’m deliberately avoiding Bumbershoot, a longstanding tradition at our house. If you go, be sure to give lots of love to the small-font bands. And put on your sunscreen! Here are some non-festival bands whose names stood out:

Fortress of the Bear

If Goldilocks comes back, they’ll be ready.

Hex Rays

Past honoree Tiny Bones has changed their name! I like the witchy/sci-fi mashup.

The Hot Club of Cowtown

Anyone who has lived in a cowtown knows why this is humorous.

She Wants Revenge

If true, you probably deserve it. Alternatively, why the bears need a fortress.

WaterToaster and the No-show Dr

Classic X and the Y structure soars over the top into downright weird. Everyone knows you can’t toast water, but you’ll need a doctor (or undertaker) if you try.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 26, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I’m getting a late start, so I’m not going to waste words on a rambling preamble. You’re here for the band names, anyway, so here they are:

Bear Axe

An actual brutal thing that sounds like something comically naughty if you’re not listening closely. Teachers pray it is not the hot new scent for middle-school boys.

Circuit of Suns

Where was this one when I wanted to do an eclipse themed post? It could also refer to an interstellar delivery route.

M.T. Tank and the Gas Guzzlers

This one has it all: classic X and the Y structure, clever wordplay, and a touch of nostalgia for the bygone era when I learned to drive.

Telekinetic Yeti

Who doesn’t love a cryptid with superpowers that rhymes?

The Outbreak

Sick maniacs making a bid for freedom.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 19, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

I was really hoping to find a batch of eclipse-themed band names, but alas, it was not to be. Noonmoon is closest, but I already wrote about them here. If you’re going to Oregon for the big event, I hope you’re already there; I feel sorry for anyone whose travels take them there for other reasons this weekend. I saw a total solar eclipse in 1979, so I’m content to stay in Seattle and experience 91% of totality with my homemade viewer. Without further ado, five band names that are not eclipse themed:

The Drolls

Like trolls, but with a more sophisticated wit.

Flicker and Fade

Alliterative poetry for dying light. Fitting for late summer.

The Hop Monsters

Evokes both beer and preschoolers, I hope not at the same time.

Lost Bayou Ramblers

Doesn’t get any rootsier than this. I can almost taste the gumbo.

Zigtebra

Twice the stripes.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 12, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

First order of business: let’s all say, “Thank you, ocean!” for the cooler temperatures and reduction in smoky haze. Now on to the important business of giving honor to these five band names:

All the Real Girls

Destroy Boys

On their own, each of these seems to comment on the gender binary. Together they make a grammatical but startling sentence. Also interesting: the members of All the Real Girls present as male; those of Destroy Boys as female.

B and the Hive

Compact iteration of classic X and the Y structure. Serendipity that the frontperson’s initial sounds like a social insect, leading to the obvious band name; and initial plus conjunction spells “band.”

Double or Muffin

Steely gambler talk softened if not outright undercut by delicious breakfast treats.

Porn Bloopers

Mortifying enough to have your failure captured on video; much worse if you’re naked and trying to be sexy.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-August 5, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

We braved the heat and smoke last night to go out to Cafe Racer, where we got to run through a sprinkler to reach the entrance. We were rewarded with a fun, free punk show featuring past Square Pig honorees Klondike Kate and Mud on My Bra!, as well as Juicy Thompson and the Snuggle Regime and Porn Bloopers, both of whom I am surprised not to have written about before. I’ll have to keep them in mind for the future because this week’s list is already full:

Blistered Earth

What with the high temps and the wild fires and the global warming, if Earth had skin, it would be blistered by now.

Ghost of a Dead Hummingbird

Poignant and strange. I like that the name is so long in honor of such a tiny spirit.

King Dome

With the words separated it seems to be about a monarch but if you’ve lived here long enough, you know better. Never been anywhere louder.

Secret Super Power

I’m always pleased to find a band name that runs up against my fiction interests. (My debut novel, The Gospel According to St Rage, features a high school girl who starts a garage band and gains superpowers.) Everybody wishes for superpowers but few who have them can afford to go public.

Up is the Down is the

Joycean circularity with a nice waltz rhythm.

Review: Treacle and Other Twisted Tales

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Treacle coverTreacle and Other Twisted Tales by Yvonne Marjot (Crooked Cat Books, 2017)

The stories in this excellent collection consist of familiar tales retold in new settings, or new tales inspired by familiar folk tale patterns. They are told in language that feels timeless and exactly right. As promised in the title, each comes with a twist: of humor, of horror, of unexpected magic.

“Aurora in Tatters” presents an Arctic Cinderella who makes her own choice. “Treacle” presents an apparently cozy and humorous situation, but watch out for that twist! “Imago,” set in an entomology lab, uses the language of moth life cycles to illustrate the end of life. “Maryika’s Journey” and “Maryika’s Christmas” follow a contemporary woman into Russian folktales. (I first encountered “Maryika’s Journey” in Paws and Claws, an animal-themed charity collection from Cake & Quill, in which work of mine also appears.) “Five Stay Home for Christmas” centers on a group of women with dogs and their plans for Christmas with no family commitments.

These are only a few of the gems in this volume. I recommend taking time to savor each one, though it’s hard not to gobble them like popcorn, as I did.

Square Pig in a Round Hole-July 29, 2017

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Square PigNaming a band is an act of concentrated creative expression. Square Pig in a Round Hole exists to reward five favorite band names each week. Winners are (usually) listed alphabetically. Selection is wholly unscientific and subject to whim, with a bias toward wordplay, humor, and local flavor. In most cases, I won’t know anything about the bands at the time of selection. Thanks to the Seattle Times club listings for abundant source material!

Historically, the last weekend of July is the most reliably sunny of the year. I can attest that I remember rain on my birthday (July 30) only once in my 54 years. But if you’re not a fan of sunshine and outdoorsy activities, feel free to hide out in a dim bar. I’m sure whatever bands are on the bill will appreciate it! These names stood out this week:

Pebble n the Crick

Charming variation on classic X and the Y structure, made more so by the folksy phonetic spelling of creek. If that weren’t enough, the name implies frontperson and backing band but it’s a duo, my favorite size combo.

Prom Date Mixtape

How he/she invited her/him to the big dance. Also, what a great name for a cover band!

Swim to the Moon

A beautiful dream. Don’t let impossibility stop you from trying.

Travis Tribble and the Mount Lake Terrorists

X and the Y structure, check; classic sci-fi reference, check; local flavor, check; word play, check; extravagant length, check. This one has everything!

Yeah No Totally

The one negative somehow renders this triple positive. Everybody’s gonna relax and have a good time.